| 1. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |"First and above all he was a logician. At least thirty-five years of the half-century or so of his existence had been... more
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| 2. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |"Psst, c'mere," said the shifty-eyed man wearing a long black trenchcoat, as he beckoned me off the rainy street into a... more
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| 3. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |. Ten percent of all car thieves are left-handed2. All polar bears are left-handed3. If your car is stolen, there's a 1... more
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| 4. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |1. They speak only the Greek language.2. They usually have long threatening names such as Bonferonni, Tchebycheff, Scha... more
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| 5. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |A mathematician and a non-mathematician are sitting in an airport hall waiting for their flight to go. The non has terr... more
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| 6. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |A new government 10 year survey cost $3,000,000,000 revealed that 3/4 of the people in America make up 75% of the popul... more
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| 7. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |A shoeseller meets a mathematician and complains that he does not know what size shoes to buy. "No problem," says the m... more
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| 8. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |A very large mathematical convention was held in Las Vegas. The conventioneers filled two hotels, each with an infinite... more
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| 9. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep, but they have a lim... more
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| 10. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Analysis:1. Differentiate it and put into the refrig. Then integrate it in the refrig.2. Redefine the measure on the re... more
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| 11. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Hello, this is probably 438-9012, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I'm probably not at home, or not wanting t... more
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| 12. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |It is often cited that there are half as many divorces as marriages in the US, so one concludes that average marriages... more
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| 13. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy. Statistics show that those people who celebrate the most bir... more
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| 14. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]. If parallel lines meet at infinity - infinity must be a very... more
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| 15. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Prove that the crocodile is longer than it is wide.Lemma 1. The crocodile is longer than it is green: Let's look at the... more
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| 16. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem : All numbers are equal to zero.Proof: Suppose that a=b. Thena = ba^2 = aba^2 - b^2 = ab - b^2(a + b)(a - b) =... more
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| 17. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 1 + 1 = 2Proof:n(2n - 2) = n(2n - 2)n(2n - 2) - n(2n - 2) = 0(n - n)(2n - 2) = 02n(n - n) - 2(n - n) = 02n - 2... more
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| 18. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 1 = -1Proof:1 = sqrt(1) = sqrt(-1 * -1) = sqrt(-1) * sqrt(-1) = 1^ = -1Also one can disprove the axiom that th... more
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| 19. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 1 = 1/2:Proof:We can re-write the infinite series 1/(1*3) + 1/(3*5) + 1/(5*7) + 1/(7*9)+...as 1/2((1/1 - 1/3)... more
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| 20. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 1$ = 10 centProof:We know that $1 = 100 centsDivide both sides by 100$ 1/100 = 100/100 cents=> $ 1/100 = 1 cen... more
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| 21. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 1$ = 1c.Proof:And another that gives you a sense of money disappearing.1$ = 100c= (10c)^2= (0.1$)^2= 0.01$= 1c... more
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| 22. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 3=4Proof:Suppose:a + b = cThis can also be written as:4a - 3a + 4b - 3b = 4c - 3cAfter reorganizing:4a + 4b -... more
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| 23. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: 4 = 5Proof:-20 = -2016 - 36 = 25 - 454^2 - 9*4 = 5^2 - 9*54^2 - 9*4 + 81/4 = 5^2 - 9*5 + 81/4(4 - 9/2)^2 = (5... more
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| 24. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: All numbers are equal.Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b. Thena + b = t(a + b)(a - b) = t(a -... more
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| 25. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: All positive integers are equal.Proof: Sufficient to show that for any two positive integers, A and B, A = B.F... more
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| 26. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: e=1Proof:2*e = f2^(2*pi*i)e^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)e^(2*pi*i) = 1Therefore:2^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)2=fThus:e=1... more
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| 27. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: log(-1) = 0Proof:a. log[(-1)^2] = 2 * log(-1)On the other hand:b. log[(-1)^2] = log(1) = 0Combining a) and b)... more
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| 28. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Theorem: n=n+1Proof:(n+1)^2 = n^2 + 2*n + 1Bring 2n+1 to the left:(n+1)^2 - (2n+1) = n^2Substract n(2n+1) from both sid... more
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| 29. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |There was this statistics student who, when driving his car, would always accelerate hard before coming to any junction... more
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| 30. | Category: Stats/Math Jokes  |
| |Two statisticians were travelling in an airplane from LA to New York. About an hour into the flight, the pilot announce... more
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